“Every person has a capacity for a certain degree of genius, through developing the power of concentrated and sustained attention.”

– J. Lowell Henderson, quoted in A Handful of Earth, a Handful of Sky by Lynell George

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“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity. Absolutely unmixed attention is prayer.”

– Simone Weil, quoted in EMBRACE FEARLESSLY THE BURNING WORLD: Essays by Barry Lopez

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I find it hard to pay attention.

Difficult to keep up with anything for an extended period of time.

A struggle to make plans, set goals or visualise the future.

I’m learning to pay attention to myself: my needs and dreams.

Writing every day is a practice of attention: what is on my mind? What is moving me.

The existence of this blog is growing evidence to refute my claims of a lack of focus.

I can sustain this practice!

Everyday I visit here to make an offering. I expect nothing in return, yet I receive all I need – the answered prayer of a creative life.

“Just because I’m losing
Doesn’t mean I’m lost
Doesn’t mean I will stop
Doesn’t mean I’m across”

– Coldplay, Lost!

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“And I found it rather strange, once the book was published, that folks on occasion would say, “But why did you write this book?” With some even asking, “Was it to find yourself?” As though, before the writing, I had been lost, which of course I was—and remained so after the book was accomplished, and am now, fourteen years later, and confidently expect to be for the remainder of my time. Lost, indeed! Don’t talk to me about finding yourself. Only as you are lost is there any hope for you.”

– Sterling Hayden, Wanderer

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When I first heard the Coldplay lyric, I thought it went, “just because I’m losing, doesn’t mean I’ve lost.” It was a fortifying lyric: whatever is getting me down, I’m still moving forward.

Of course, I’ve felt lost my whole life. It’s that half joking, “I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up” line that reflects that feeling of not quite being settled.

But if I’m still searching at least I am not stuck.

Stuck means stopped, unable (or unwilling to try) to move.

I might not know exactly where I should be, but I keep looking.

We can all avoid the hopelessness of being lost by staying curious.

Curiosity in motion.

“Every night I try myself by court martial to see if I have done anything effective during the day. I don’t mean just pawing the ground—anyone can go through the motions—but something really effective.”

– Winston Churchill, quoted in Stillness is the Key by Ryan Holiday

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“But it really does not matter what you are called, or where your work is placed, as long as it brings some kind of joy to some person someplace. To create something out of nothing is a wonderful experience. To take a blank piece of paper and draw characters that people love and worry about is extremely satisfying.”

Charles M. Schulz, My Life With Charlie Brown

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Success and effectiveness is personal.

Right now, success is posting a new blog post every single day.

It reflects my commitment to and joy of reading.

I love writing. I cannot stop.

I do not worry right now if I have an audience.

The success is in the doing, not the sharing.

“Probably the biggest lesson I have learned in my career is that my errors of omission have damaged me far more than any errors of commission.

What I have left undone, un-thought, and untried through selfdoubt have been incredible, missed opportunities. You are guaranteed a 100% failure rate if you never try. I have seldom been damaged much by the things I attempted to do or that didn’t go right.”

– Pen Densham, Riding the Alligator

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“You miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t take.”

– Wayne Gretzky

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This blog post is not great.

I don’t have much to say today.

Fortunately I am piggy-backing on the shoulders of Pen and Wayne.

Their words have far more power than my own.

I haven’t missed the publication of my daily post.

I have tried, so cannot have failed.

I could have done better, but I have kept a promise to myself.

I have put in another rep to strengthen my resolve.

There’s no shame in not being perfect.

“Dealing with events is similar to being a good parent. It is not enough to just show up. You need a point of view and a set of tools. It is impossible to deal with events constructively without being prepared.”

– Phil Stutz, Lessons for Living

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“I want to suggest that to write to your best abilities, it behooves you to construct your own toolbox and then build up enough muscle so you can carry it with you. Then, instead of looking at a hard job and getting discouraged, you will perhaps seize the correct tool and get immediately to work.”

– Stephen King, On Writing: A Memoir Of The Craft

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What tools do you have to deal with the day to day?

We turn up to life, that’s a given.

If we don’t, we are dead.

In between birth and death is our choices and the tools we use to navigate and support us on our journey.

Our point of view, or our attitude, informs what tools we select and what we do with them.

What do I carry around with me? How do I carry myself?

Am I prepared?

For what?

A good question.

Some tools have universal applications:

Physical health.

Writing.

A sense of humour.

Patience.

Curiosity.

Love.

A good starter set of tools to cope with most day to day challenges.

“Year by year
Month by month
Day by day
Thought by thought”

– Leonard Cohen, Steer Your Way

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Artists are often asked to state their intention. They sometimes try. But really, this question is the wrong way round. Intention evolves as a result of capacity. You don’t know what you’re doing, till you try to do it. As capacity increases, so does ambition. But when it comes to getting the words on the page, you can only work breath by breath, line by line.”

– Hilary Mantel, A Memoir of My Former Self

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All writing is created word by word.

The same word can be used for the beginning, middle or end.

I don’t know what I am going to write here, until I start writing it.

Sometimes the words flow and I feel quite happy with the result.

This is when I feel I’ve given my all to the post and do not want to add another word.

Other times it is more laborious.

Today is more of the latter.

I carry on writing because I know I can. Words always appear. They may need to be deleted or rearranged, but they keep on coming.

Today might not be my best work, but I get to try again tomorrow.

There is no danger inherent in bad writing, it’s only words after all.

“Shipping, because it doesn’t count if you don’t share it. Creative, because you’re not a cog in the system. You’re a creator, a problem solver, a generous leader who is making things better by producing a new way forward. Work, because it’s not a hobby. You might not get paid for it, not today, but you approach it as a professional. The muse is not the point, excuses are avoided, and the work is why you are here.”

– Seth Godin, The Practice

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“Amateurs are sometimes separated from professionals by skill, but always by motivation; the term itself derives from the Latin amare—“ to love.” The essence of amateurism is intrinsic motivation: to be an amateur is to do something for the love of it.”

– Clay Shirky, Cognitive Surplus Creativity and Generosity in a Connected Age

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I’m a professional, not because I get paid, but because I show up every day.

If I didn’t turn up to my paid job, I’d be in trouble.

I want to be as reliable in the work I choose to do for myself as I am in work for others.

The reward for my diligence is not a pay check or bonus, but in identifying and reminding myself of what is vital and taking action every day.

I work like a professional to satisfy the amateur’s needs.

Because I need satisfy no one but myself.

“A high self-regard and inflated ego can actually limit creativity, as confidence gives way to laziness.

You’ll roll out the same ideas over and over again, many of them powered by hubris rather than good judgement.

And because even the egotistical don’t like an ego-tripping colleague, you’ll eventually be brought back to Earth by envious and irritated enemies.

There’s no telling how the crash will happen, or when it will happen, but the self-satisfied and over-confident will always crash. And as you lie twisted and broken in the wreckage, it’s here that you’ll discover your best ideas.

Because brilliance begins at rock bottom.”

– Erik Kessels, Failed It!

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“Well, I’ve been down so Goddamn long
That it looks like up to me
Well, I’ve been down so very damn long
That it looks like up to me
Yeah, why don’t one you people
C’mon and set me free.”

– The Doors, Been Down So Long

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There is a freedom of inhabiting the world down, close to the ground.

You are unnoticed so your tinkering passes unremarked.

If you lift up into a higher plane it’s because you have built something yourself.

You rise upon solid ground, without the hollowness of the overconfident beneficiaries of nepotism.

But there is no guarantee of a prolonged and steady rise.

The likelihood of crashing back to earth is high.

But it’s familiar down here. There are tools to use. I can work in the shadows some more. There is still the promise of light and success, perhaps.

I make my home on rock bottom. But I built it with wheels. I am ready to move up at any time.

“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”

– Jesus, quoted in The Gnostic Gospels by Elaine Pagela

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“The interesting thing, and what old Joe Campbell talked about—I was privileged to meet him early in the sixties—is: What does it do to a man or a woman when they refuse the call? It creates a kind of explosive negative force in their life.”

– Jim Harrison, Conversations With Jim Harrison

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What does it do to us to sit on an idea, an identity, a compulsion, a call?

Is it really toxic to ignore our internal impulses?

Only time will tell.

Perhaps it’s a question that can only be properly answered at the end of life.

That sounds a bit long to wait.

What a risk to assume that I can put off my dreams into an infinite tomorrow.

How can I be a little braver today to follow the call to adventure?

Perhaps taking small steps is OK if they are heading in the right direction.

But if I hesitate to move forward, what then?

Will I really destroy myself?

Is it like holding in a fart to save myself from embarrassment?

Will it really smell that bad?

Will it even make a sound?

It’s not healthy to hold in waste gas.

Let it out.

What’s the worse that can happen?

Adventure awaits!

Are you ready?

Pull my finger…

“I learned that the successful product has to appeal to customers, and the criteria they use to determine what to purchase may have surprisingly little overlap with the aspects that are important during usage. The best products do not always succeed. Brilliant new technologies might take decades to become accepted. To understand products, it is not enough to understand design or technology: it is critical to understand business.”

– Don Norman, The Design of Everyday Things

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“Always do three things when you present a Big Idea:

1. Tell them what they are going to see.

2. Show it to them.

3. Tell them, dramatically, what they just saw.

To sell work I could be proud of, I’ve had to rant, rave, threaten, shove, push, cajole, persuade, wheedle, exaggerate, flatter, manipulate, be obnoxious, be loud, occasionally lie, and always sell, passionately!

Abraham Lincoln once said: “When I hear a man preach, I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.

To be a successful creative, be prepared for a lifetime fighting bees (even if you sometimes get stung).”

– George Lois, Damn Good Advice

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No one is above selling. We sell ourselves every day.

It might be as simple as worrying about how we are perceived by others. That’s selling. We want people to have a certain impression of us.

We cannot exist without thinking about ourselves in relation to others. Life is not a vacuum but a web.

Some people have mastered the creation of networks, they deliberately spin as big and strong a web as possible.

Others, myself included, neglect those bonds with others. We might seek to build them in our minds with books. But they are the virtual strands of ideas.

It is difficult to seek attention when you have told yourself that you prefer your own company.

But palms need to be greased, audiences need to be entertained for us to succeed in creating anything that lasts.

I have wilfully not sought an audience for this piece, or any of these conversations.

Am I too afraid to sell? Or to miss the mark, or be stung with the indifference of others?

Do I really risk anything in sharing my ideas?

What is the danger of keeping myself off to the side?

There is a fresh pool of water here that is fed by a natural spring of my ideas.

Surely there are some who would appreciate being guided to some light refreshment?